Is "Bullying" The New Buzzword?

When I was in junior high, I was a very shy kid.  I also had somehow attracted the attention of my science teacher, who made it clear to everyone that I was the "teacher's pet".  Those two unfortunate things combined made me the perfect target for the class bully, "Chris" (a girl).  She would harass me every day, with such witty taunts as " 'Lauren' sounds like 'urine' ".  Unfortunately, I was too afraid to respond with the equally witty "oh yeah, well 'Chris' sounds like 'piss' " that I was screaming inside my head.  So I suffered in silence every day, letting Chris pick on me, enduring it while her friends would push each other into me, slam into the locker next to mine, etc.  Needless to say, it was a living hell and, for several weeks, I was scared and miserable every day at school.

In those days, there was no anti-bully campaign.  Rather, it was every kid for him/herself.  If you had a problem with another kid, you either put up with it, or you found a way to resolve it yourself. So the bullying continued, until one day I reached my breaking point.  I waited for Chris after class, and with my little fists shaking, I beat the living tar out of her.  Now, when I retell this story to my kids, I say that she threw the first punch.  But the truth is, her bullying hurt far worse than anything she could do to me physically, and to this day I stand behind my decision to throw the first punch.  After that, she and her little gang of future minimum wage workers left me alone.  That day I learned to stand up for myself, to not be afraid of bullies, and to refuse to take crap from anyone.  That self-taught lesson served me well as I grew up and was able to hold my own as a 5'4" woman in a corporate world filled with men and assorted grown-up bullies.

Fast forward almost 3 decades, and you have a whole new atmosphere.  Schools have swung 180 degrees in the opposite direction and are now hyper-sensitive to bullying.  You can't pass a school without seeing "Bully Free Zone" spray painted on the side of the building.  Heaven forbid two kids have the slightest altercation, or bump into each other on the playground, the school immediately goes to DEFCON 1 - doors are locked down, parents are beckoned from work and swat teams are called in.

I exaggerate of course, but not by much.  I recently had an issue involving one of my kids that illustrates the current over-the-top anti-bullying climate in our schools.  My son, who is in 2nd grade, became the object of desire for a female classmate whose crush on him was approaching the level of Glen Close in Fatal Attraction.  She hounded him relentlessly to be his project partner, gym partner, to sit next to him at lunch, play with him at recess, etc.  While at first I found this adorable, it soon became too much for my son, who came home in tears one day asking if he could transfer classes to get away from this girl and the teasing from the other kids who were aware of the situation.  So, at the yearly parent-teacher meeting, I calmly explained the situation to the teacher, and asked that the girl and my son be separated in class and not be partners for class projects.  Her response?  "That is bullying!  She is bullying your son, and with your permission, I would like to get the school psychologist involved."  I was completely taken aback by this response.  Was she crazy?  "Um, no, this is not bullying, it is just a crush", I responded, "and you certainly do NOT have my permission to subject this girl to psychological counseling just because she has a little thing for my son!"

Don't get me wrong, I am all for raising awareness of bullying and teaching kids that it is wrong and will not be tolerated.  But this knee-jerk reaction of labeling every student altercation "bullying" seems way over the top to me.  How are our kids ever going to learn to resolve conflicts themselves if they are not allowed to even try?  If they are herded off to the school psychologist every time they express themselves or have a disagreement?  What is that teaching them about handling conflict or emotions, and how will they ever survive in the real world?
What do you think?  Have the schools taken the anti-bullying campaign so far that it is actually hurting our kids more than it is helping them?